Mother's Day has so many different nuances. To me, it used to be a joy-filled day celebrating my beloved Mutti. Even though we lived an ocean apart for the last 17 years of her life, I would make every effort to make this day special to her. Until she suddenly passed away in 2013, it had not occurred to me much that this was a day for me to be celebrated as well, seeing that I am a mother of one son. Mother's Day had always been all about my mom in my mind.
I'll never forget my first Mother's Day without her. It was May 2014, and spring was just starting to emerge in Michigan after a very long and hard winter. It was the year after we had survived one ice storm and polar vortex after another. Usually I had been excited about spring because of all the new flowers popping out and the trees finally showing some green. But that year seemed dismal to me. How was I going to survive Mother's Day without my Mutti? How could I even dare celebrate on this day? How was I going to react seeing other daughters being by their mom's sides?
I had completed a little bit of preparation by attending a GriefShare support group. So I knew to plan something or to at least anticipate that the day would be challenging. I made my husband aware of my concern and he was very supportive, as he had lost his mom a few
years before that.
The good news is, that I survived that day. The better news is, that I now celebrated being a mother and actually enjoyed being the one celebrated. The best news is, that I started feeling very compassionate toward all the motherless people around me.
So even though I still miss my dear Mutti after all these years, the pain has decreased and my compassion toward others who have lost their moms has increased. God has also blessed me richly with many "like-a-mom" women who have taken over some aspects of mothering me. I know I am always prayed for by these ladies and I know that they have my back.
This Mother's Day I look back on the influence of my Mutti on my life with deep gratefulness, and I look forward to how I may support and encourage any motherless women!
May God bless your mothering!
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